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Sad Cowboy Goes on Dance-Strike Until “Yellowstone” Comes Back On The T.V.

Cowboy in Tucson Sad About Yellowstnoe
Sad Cowboy Goes on Dance-Strike Until “Yellowstone” Comes Back

TUCSON- Raylon Carver has hung up his hat and put away his dancing boots...for now that is. The long-standing "The Maverick: King of Clubs" is a Tucson favorite for cowboy hangs and Raylon has been a regular for a couple of years now frequenting their "Friday Night Country House Party", the "Saturday Cowboy Brunch" and, most importantly, "Line Dance Wednesdays" where he has been teaching newcomers two-stepping, line dancing and Country Swing.

"When 'Watermelon Crawl' comes on, ya'll better clear the prairie," Raylon gleefully says behind a somber smile before tipping his hat and taking a longneck swig of Coors Light. However, not all is O.K. in this Tucson Corral. It was January 1st since the Season 5 Winter Finale of "Yellowstone" aired and Raylon is fanatical about the popular neo-Western. "You know, it reminded me of my own life wishing I was actually from Montana. All the roping, wrangling, rivalry murders, financial espionage, familial deception, tight jeans and bar fights. You know. Man stuff. I miss it."

Raylon takes another swig of beer and looks out onto the dance floor. "You see, these folks come here to escape life. I used to come here to live it." Raylon stopped giving dance lessons around July after Paramount was ambiguous about the show's final season return. "Then came the writer's strike and I'll be damned! Don't these California people know what it means to finish what you started!? I ain't dancing till the cows come home, ya hear?!" Raylon admits he moved from Los Angeles in 2019. "Yeah, I'm not proud of my club promoter/DJ and fashion model days, but it paid well and kept the lanterns lit if you know what I mean."

We ask Raylon why he stopped dancing due to the show's long hiatus. "Ghandi stopped dancing and it worked for him, right?" We point out that Paramount Network's executive decision-making has little, if nothing, to do with British imperialism or religious pluralism. "Yeah, whatever you say, buckaroo". Raylon takes one final swig and returns to a clear spot on the dance floor to sit next to a makeshift campfire and broods as the dancing swirls around him to Kenny Chesney's "She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy".

We will return to visit Raylon once the final episodes of "Yellowstone" air on Paramount Network to see if he returns to his cowboy ways.


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